I had promised you another post about my experience when I land in India, but little did I know that I am going to have to write one about my in-flight experience too. Hope you enjoy this post because I didn’t enjoy the flight at all.
Delta an (un-)trusted name in the airline business. While standing in the check-in line at the JFK I was talking to a Brazilian guy settled in NYC with his business in Dubai. Talk about how technology is changing the way we live our lives. He enlightened me with the fact that of all international carriers Delta was the one with the maximum percentage of lost luggage. Man I was surprised, I would have thought Air-India would have take the top spot. One more bad thing about we Indians is that we are rarely proud of anything that’s Indian. So guys don’t blame me if you ask me “What did you get for me?” and I reply “I did get something for you but Delta misplaced it”.
As I write this post the entire plane is shaking as if it’s a BEST bus plying on the Bombay roads. See I told you we never appreciate anything….Indians!!
“What?”
“Did you say you are not like that?”
“…cmon don’t lie…not atleast to yourself….we are all the same…”
Anyways that’s completely another topic of discussion. As of now lets concentrate on my inflight experience.
For starters the flight attendants are not at all good looking. Secondly they are not young except one who looks like a gujarati from Ahemdabad trying to talk in a fake English accent and crack the same dumb jokes to every person he serves onboard. Then there is this gujarati uncle (I know it because ever since I mentioned that I was Gujarati, he has been coming around and cribbing about other passengers, to me in gujarati, I don’t have against gujarati’s Trust ME!!) His face looks like my grandma, or rather like any other elderly who has lost all the teeth. If you ask for his help, to get a glass of water, he stares right back at you and that looks just quenches you thirst there and then. Then there is this lady (I am not sure if she is gujurati) who thinks that she is really good with Hindi and repeats all the announcements made by the captain in Hindi for those who don’t understand English. But then my guess is even if they know hindi they wouldn’t be able to decode what she’s trying to say. She talks Hindi the same way as a Bengali would talk, mixing all the genders (striling and pulling). Last but not the least there are 2 firangs who would be in their late thirties.
Now I was pretty exicted when my friend told me that in Delta you have your personal TV and you can choose which movie you want to watch. So I thought then whats the use of bringing my laptop along, but now I know otherwise. Once we were airborne the captain announced that now we can enjoy the movie that we like. I chose to watch “Stranger than Fiction”. If you haven’t watched this movie, please do because the actress is pretty HOT and then it also has a good plot. I was just 20mins in the movie and the captain announced that some of the television screens were not working and the ground support had advised to reboot the entire system, which meant we all would have to wait for 15mins before we can start watching the movies again. But then if only technology worked the way it should. For the sake of a couple of complaining passengers (why couldn’t they be happy that atleast their neighbours were enjoying the movies) most of us lost our in-air entertainment. I always wondered who uses Red Hat Linux, now I know the answer. Boeing 777 does. So now that the TV’s were out I had to fall back on one of the three things iPod, Book and Laptop. I am mixing and matching them to keep myself from getting bored. But I noticed one thing, each time I start with the book by the time I turn the third page I am asleep. I guess doctors should change the prescription for insomnia from sleeping pills to books. I am sure it would work for me, but then again maybe because I am not an insomniac.
I guess now its time to switch back to my book and sleep because my thought stream is drying out for now. I had one more couple to write about, the one whos sitting by my side, an elderly gujarati couple “Patels”from Bombay with Greencards. But as I am writing this the uncle is reading every word I type, or atleast I think so, so I cant write much about them. Lets just consider that they are a typical elderly Patel couple and leave it at that.
